Monday, December 3, 2012

Branching Out

 This blog is part of an effort toward collecting my thoughts and experiences of trauma in a book for general readership.  At times I struggle to stay on track with the project, life gets in the way, but if I criticize myself for not doing enough or moving fast enough, I will have defeated my purpose.  Instead, I remind myself that the book is an ongoing process that will reach its completion at the right time, if I don't get in my own way.

The book seems to come together in tree form, like the "Grandfather Tree" that embraces the window of my study.  Branches of meaning come together at a central core, while all around the edges are leaflets of ideas; snippets of life clustering around connective twigs of story.  It is a network of personal and interpersonal energies moving in many directions through space and time.  My Self in connection with the Universe; the Spirit of harmony; the FLOW.

The trick is to allow myself to tolerate vulnerability - to trust - after all of the hard knocks of life in the real world of relationships and obligations.  To trust my Self, I must find ways to practice mindful awareness in the day to day.  It is essential to relationships, to my immune system, to my bio-social-emotional wellbeing, that I engage in connection, rather than dwell in the stress of task completion, interspersed with withdrawal and escape tactics.  In order to move through our part of the "network" effectively, we must open channels for energies to FLOW through, and find release.  Willingness to be open, to be mindful without judgement, to avoid imposing meanings; willingness to merely observe, with compassion, our own actions, and those of others; that is the Buddhist concept of Zen with with we can counterbalance the hectic, daily distractions and details of our lives in "Real-Time."

Look to the trees for inspiration (literally "to breathe in").  As energy flows from earth and sky, they take it in, and maintain flexibility.  Trees flourish in good times and stand strong amidst storms.  They endure, participating in the cycle of life without trying to grab control of their environment.  Giving breath and taking nourishment from their interconnection with the living things around them, creating new growth from decay, transforming that which enters their field.  They remain rooted in the earth until their time on earth is complete, yet even then, they contribute to the warmth, the shelter, the comfort of others, even the pages on which my book will eventually be printed is a gift of the trees; Inspiring.

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